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Describing Your Body Online
Written by Jennifer Nickert
For those of us who are
single and browsing online we’ve all seen the dating websites and
ads. Have you ever looked a picture and the description of that
person was obviously written by Helen Keller. As someone who
internet dates and professionally writes profiles and dating ads I
have seen it all.
Just tonight I was contacted on one site
by someone who had a single photo in his profile. It included
another man and no description to tell you which guy was the dater
and which was his friend. I being the clever girl always assume
it’s the more unattractive person in the pic, which was the case
tonight. While I do see the genius behind his faux paux, which I
will get into a little later, it’s deceiving and doesn’t really
benefit him in the end. He held my attention for a minute, but the
end result would be the same whether it was an instant rejection
or after he emailed a few times before he explained himself to the
ladies. For the record it was not just his looks that lost my
attention, his lack of confidence was a big factor, but there were
a lot more turn offs than just those, but that’s for another
article.
I’m just going to say upfront, this will probably
offend someone, I apologize in advance. I don’t mean to hurt
anyone’s feelings, I’m trying to guide you to accurately portray
your true self so someone can get to know you and not feel
deceived.
The body types are pretty simple, with some grey
areas, but most people fit into these categories Thin, Athletic,
Average, A Few Extra Pounds, Big or Tall and BBW (Big Beautiful
Woman).
Thin: Someone with very little
body fat and hardly any muscle, possibly skeletal.
Athletic: This is for toned, firm, or muscled men, with
very little fat, no guts, no double chins, at a healthy weight.
Average: This is for men who are on the lean
side, but not toned or muscle bound, thicker than thin, but
similar. In your ideal weight category, just not as firm as
athletic.
A Few Extra Pounds: This is for
those with slight love handles, between 5-30lbs overweight.
Big & Tall: If you are big or tall you can be
in this category. This means you are overweight by more than
30lbs. If you are short and big you still belong in this category.
If you are very tall and overweight this is your category too.
BBW: This stands for Big Beautiful Women. It
used to be a term for a select few women who were overweight, but
truly beautiful, well put together, now it’s basically the term
many sites and women use for being overweight. If you are more
than 30lbs overweight this is your category. There usually isn’t a
category for Big Ugly Women interestingly enough.
There are
obviously grey areas, such as my friend Scott. He’s a big,
handsome guy who clearly works out, he has large arm muscles and
chest, but he has a small gut and a big chubby face. He placed
himself in the athletic category. While I don’t think of him as
unathletic, it’s not about whether he plays a sport or works out,
it’s about describing his body type and he could easily fit into
the few extra pounds or technically the big & tall category. I’m
sure he is more than 30lbs over his doctor’s ideal weight for him.
So, although he technically fits in several categories, I would
place him in the few extra pounds and then in the profile explain
he is athletic and works out often.
Most people have body
type preferences and this helps explain and sort the people you
are looking into dating.
The faux paux I wrote about
earlier, was the man, we’ll call him Chris, being deceptive about
who he was. It’s clearly the wrong thing to do overall, but the
clever part was he got a lot more people to look at his profile
with the other man in the pic then he would have on his own.
If you are truly unattractive, which is rare, everyone has their
own beauty, it can be very frustrating trying to find someone in a
looks driven online dating webpage. Don’t resort to deception,
just be yourself and the right one will come along. Instead of 10
emails from men who are mislead and will stop talking to you when
they find out, which can be hurtful and disheartening, just be
honest and when you only get one reply, you will know its genuine.
There is someone out there for EVERYONE! I promise you. Be
honest, be yourself and be patient.
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